Two Pommie Sheilas: Mummy bloggers aren’t that loathsome after all

People have started to stand aside for me as I waddle my bulk down hallways, complete strangers are offering to help get me into my car at supermarkets if someone has parked too close and I can’t squeeze my bloated mid-section past a wing mirror, and I can only fill the bath halfway or I displace enough water to flood the bathroom.

Yep, that’s just three ways I can tell I’m almost done with pregnancy. Well, they’re the most print-friendly ones I can share.

Everyone told me it would happen. I was warned. And, like all well-meaning advice, I nodded politely as I was told, all the while thinking “nah, I won't be like that, I don’t need to listen to this”.

As any parent will tell you, from the second people know you are carrying that bun in the oven, you’ll be bombarded with helpful hints and tips, so much so that if you’re anything like me you try and avoid soliciting any more advice at all costs.

So, it was timely that this week a social media post from a new dad who welcomed his firstborn into the world a few days ago went viral.

Written by an Imgur user, the post details all the things no one had told him about the birth of his pride and joy but wished they had. His wife added her own list, too.

There were sweet things (“as a man you’re gonna cry”), downright practical things (“you’re not ready”), and slightly terrifying things (“always know where your barf bag is”).

None of it was ground-breaking, and before pregnancy I would have taken one look at the post and rolled my eyes wondering what was so special that it deserved the attention it was getting.

Bringing a child into the world isn’t easy, and those who’ve done it before know exactly how hard it is.

But at 37 weeks gone I lapped it up. I might even have shed a tear at how sweet it was (don’t judge me unless you’ve experienced these hormones).

I have always had a loathing of all things mummy-blogger and Instamum. I have never understood why these women are popular. It’s nothing personal against them, I’m sure they are just lovely, but I don’t get why they are so interesting.

Or rather I didn’t get it. Past tense. Much like that viral post, as my due date gets closer I’m suddenly reading and following those blogs and accounts and actually listening to all that advice that gets thrown your way by family, friends and strangers.

Some of it I’ve immediately ignored — don't be afraid to feed your baby gin to help sleep patterns — but other bits have been fascinating and filed away for future use.

In my defence, I’m going to blame it on the hormonal homesickness I’ve experienced as a pregnant Pom in Perth missing her mother and best friend.

But if I really think carefully about it, I realise that while that expat excuse definitely does hold some weight, the reason everyone offers up this advice, and why I suddenly seem to crave it, is far simpler.

Bringing a child into the world isn’t easy, and those who’ve done it before know exactly how hard it is.

While their advice might not always be the best, it’s definitely well-intentioned.

So, I make this pledge, once my little one is born, I’ll be joining the ranks of the annoying advice-givers, because it does actually help.

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